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Hoooah!

Without joe it takes me about 2 or more hours for my engines to warm up, but today I’m kicking at 40 mins, which is just about as much time as it takes me to get ready to go to work on my days on. I think the little coffee maker I got myself yesterday will improve my life a few notches, since I usually have a great day when I start it hitting the ground running. Let’s see what I can accomplish around here today, my first and primary task is to clean up this pigsty of an apartment. Nothing gross, but lots of clutter…

Thing is, I haven’t really decided where to put all my non-stowed items–thus their current state of being non-stowed. Great example of such are the 4 small boxes of clothes that I haven’t figured out where to put… until yesterday, that is. I had two of these stackable mini-shelves that I hadn’t bothered to put together since I got them two years ago after coming back from mrmmrrm hrrmm. I put them together finally yesterday and now have alot more shelf space to put the rest of my shit. Then I gotta put away my bags and stuff from my trip to SF this last weekend (Thanks Law and Cookie for hosting me!)

Last two days I’ve been thinking about my future… nothing real different from the previous 100 days before it, as I’ve been worrying alot as of late about what I’m going to do come this October 2008 when my current work contract expires. But I’ve started worrying about finding a girlfriend again… something I haven’t done since I stopped seeing the last chick I was seeing. I think the short of it is that whenever I feel a bit overwhelmed I tend to retreat to my computer and start tooling around with it… something I’ve known for a while but have refused to admit to myself and others. It’s the reason I can’t program when I had wanted to program, or the reason for all my self-contradictory actions in the past few months. It’s my fault, and I’m done with self-pity and being afraid to move forward, the way I keep telling everyone else around me to do.

It makes sense, though… for all my friends who are in changing situations (a few of my friends have or are moving for work soon) I am always excited for them and find myself wishing change upon myself, never actually understanding that the power to do so has always lay within me, and I just have to get off my ass and do it. I know I knew this before, but somehow over the last few years I’ve lost that realization.

I started it, though. Yesterday I went to Walmart and bought all this shit that I kept telling myself I was saving up for… enablers, if you will. Well I finally decided to buy them–pots, pans, said coffee maker, and a rice cooker. Scratch one off my list:

• Being able to cook for myself–check.

So what remains?

• Maintain a clean apartment
• Draft and refine resume for next year
• Make progress on my MMO (shh)
• Take classes, go to seminars, actually be busy

That’s my personal list, anyway.

Well, it’s time for me to start my day… enough yapping here. TTYL.

-O